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Every morning I wake up between 5 and 6:30am. There are two exceptions. On Fridays and Sundays, I wake up between 7 and 8 am.

I am on the mats teaching and training 7 days a week for anywhere between 2 hours (Sundays) and 8 hours (Tuesdays and Thursdays) in addition to a few hours per week of cross training (running, strength and conditioning, recently picked up mma).

I average about 7.5 hours of sleep per night and I’m tired more often than not. My body always has some kind of ache that I push through and some kind of pain that I work around. My shoulder has been injured for a couple of months now with what is likely a strained pec tendon or a microtear in the rotator cuff. I somehow hurt my knee yesterday and had to skip this morning’s training session because it seized up a little over night. I push forward.

It didn’t always used to be like this.

I used to train only about 4 hours a week. I had a nice little schedule. I was consistent and I knew what days each week I would be there and had my life worked in pretty well around it.

Over time, I started to pick up more responsibility… More opportunities to train… More opportunities to teach. I knew in my heart JiuJitsu was what I wanted to do with my life so I started to take more time out of my life to devote to teaching and training.

Four hours turned into ten (I remember counting this exact number).

Ten hours turned into twelve.

Twelve hours turned into too many to count.

I am writing this today because I woke up pissed at myself for having skipped training. I woke up pretty upset at 6:00am because when I got out of bed, my knee automatically buckled. No pain, just didn’t feel good enough to test it today. I got back in bed and laid around for another 15 minutes. I tried again. Still really sore and then I felt my entire body ache from taking on some MMA training yesterday. I laid back in bed for another 15 minutes. By this time, I made one last attempt to get to training. I got up and realized that even if I left right then and there, I would be a 15 minutes late to class…. and then what? Not be able to train?

Even despite all the hours I put in on a weekly basis… I was still hard on myself for not being able to get up at even 50%. 50% is my threshold… If I feel at least 50%, I am training.

I went back to bed and got a couple more hours of sleep.

I woke up better. Knee was feeling better, body wasn’t aching as much. My mind stopped racing.

Sometimes it’s ok to take a morning/day/evening off. Listen to your body and make the decision that’s best for you long-term.

I can’t be too upset. I’m back at it this afternoon.

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